Wednesday, October 30, 2002


I have been reading here for the past three hours and I am in absolute awe. I have therefore discovered that I am completely unworthy.

These people write, and they not just write, they animated the darn thing and even has a radio play!~ No words. Just... brillianceness. Eee. I'll blog if I still have time later.

She gunned them down | 2:25 AM

Tuesday, October 29, 2002

I don't like that review. Maybe I should rethink a bit of my opinions. Maia!~

She gunned them down | 10:27 PM

Today I think I'll talk about 'Ekai's reason why'.

I have been asked time and again why I write fiction. And almost every time I have no ready answers. That is because, even I myself do not know exactly why I write.

And I tell myself:

1.) I write because I'm an anime nut. But I think being an anime nut does not qualify for a reason. A lot of anime nuts don't write fanfiction. They're satisfied with the anime they gorge on. I however, need to fic to survive. Which leads me to my next point.

2.) I write because I need to. Sure. But I don't HAVE to write fanfic, right? Some people tell me I choose the way of the fanfic because it's easy and it's stable. Should I start believing they're right?

3.) I write because I hated the ending. Or do I? In fact, I didn't not like the ending of CCS-- I loved it to bits. Also, writing ExT is, what? A subliminal attempt at correcting glaring CLAMP mistakes (I AM a rabid fangrrl.)? I think not. Besides, I know for a fact that I do NOT write ExT just so I can imagine that they were canon. They're already canon in my head. Gah, that didn't make sense. Next!~

4.) I write to please other people. This is the closest thing I have to truth. I write because other people tell me they like how I write. That's weird, maybe you people now think I write just for the fame and for the reviews. I don't live for the reviews but that doesn't mean I don't like getting them. Is this, then, what Oneesama was talking about? That we all seek some sort of admiration, and am I being consumed by this elation?

Tsk, people shouldn't try to understand me at times like these.

5.) I write for myself. Or do I? I certainly don't write because it's a chore. I write because I can make me happy with my writing. Maybe. Sometimes.

I don't know. Maybe I just need food.

She gunned them down | 8:49 PM

I'm not unproductive. That's because I have inspiring oneesama, enthusiastic imouto-tachi, and the power of three. In short, I have new fic.

Here. The first off the Illusione arc.

Because you write me fic, I believe it's high time I reciprocate. Besides, I'm cheating. I wrote the Illusione arc last a few months ago and I'm just tweaking it now. ^-^

Also. Regarding your problem, love, cheer up and chin up. I'm sorry but I just got myself online today and only now read you log and comments. Time difference. I did tell you that your opinions on your own log are yours and nobody can claim to hate you for it. That's because it's opinion, no matter how rude it is. I don't know why she went to you instead of here (where all the madness erupted anyway) or to somebody else's place. This isn't your fault. In fact I quite think this was mine.

So I will call that girl's cellular phone today and maybe beg her for the atonement of our souls. (I'm trying to make you laugh so if you don't that'll mean I'm a lousy Oneesama and I'm not worthy.) Or maybe just mine. I know I'm sort of a biatch regarding such issues (She knows how I feel exactly-- she listens to me rant about such things every single day.). I would explain but that would only be me washing my hands off of the task and I don't really want that. I know I did wrong.

She gunned them down | 8:00 PM

Monday, October 28, 2002

I'm on chibi-spolied-Ekai mode. Ph34rrr.

I want better, better, better Iris fic that doesn't have the poor girl screaming over Oogami, it's just injustice.

I want good ExT waff and I want it now so cough 'em up or else no Masquerade OR Nocturne.

I want Asuka Jr. plushiee.

I want non yaoi GWing fic and I want it now and I want it liberally sprinkled with angst and tears on the side, a crying!Heero? Hmm, yummy.

I want fanart. NOW.

I want good lemon. NOW.

I want I want I want I want I want!!

She gunned them down | 10:25 PM

All right, so I was kidding. It was impossible to resist ficcation especially after I got my hands on 11 cds of Kaitou Saint Tail and then her singing Tom Jones' "It's Not Unusual" with me. And then me listening to weepy Ally McBeal soundtracks and boom, I just HAD to fic. It's called obsessive-compulsive.

Your fic is finished. When do you want it?

Your fic is half-done.

Your fic I'm still tweaking.

All righty, I think that's enough imouto plugging. New linkage: Maia darling and Refe love. ^-^

She gunned them down | 8:46 PM

Sunday, October 27, 2002

I need general emailing to peoples regarding hiatus. Ergh.

She gunned them down | 7:34 PM

All fiction will be discontinued until I can get my head checked.

She gunned them down | 7:17 PM

Saturday, October 26, 2002


Okay, a self-centered post: people, bear.

On Iris ansgstation (caught by her): I like the idea of Iris angst. Iris is sunshine, given, and she is bright and sparkly and lovely, but I guess I wanted to explore a side of Chateaubriand often neglected. That is, Iris is (according to Oogami) in a difficult age, trying to find her way out of the childishness of her past and groping her way into an uncertain future. In that, I'm pretty damn sure Iris-chan has a lot of teenage angst within her genki little smile.

I realize, while I looked over most of my fics today, that I have been writing much angst. (Gee? Ya think?) I've explained in here that maybe such angstation is a subliminal attempt to balance things out with main log sparkling. I'm not exactly sure myself.

I think I excel in angst. I am best writing heart-wrenching. I reread over past and future ficcation and deduced that I am most verbose and... affective when I write angst. I wonder if this is bad-- sometimes I wonder if my writing is stewing in eternal sadness. I don't really LIKE angsting too much, sometimes I even force myself to write humor or WAFF, but it's just not as impactive as I want it to be.

I try, very very hard, to write sugary sweet things but sometimes, they begin that way and end with the shattering of a few hearts here and there. It MORPHS. I'm not lying.

So I reread. I reread WAFFy things but even the WAFF I know and love are not spared a bit of angst beforehand.

I don't want to be like this forever.

Also, on a few other things I went through while socially blogging:

I write because I make people happy.

I think that my happiness stems much from the belief that my fics make people genuinely happy that they read it. I love my fics to pieces, not only because I work so hard on them, but also because they are loved by other people. I believe people when they say they loved my fic. Sometimes I DO get reviews that sound a tad insincere but I know the people who matter and I appreciate their reviews muchly. As I've told Oneesama, I believe my friends when they review me. They are the people I write for.

So I hope I REALLY do make people happy with my fics. I try not to think badly about anything but I never really do know unless I'm told to my face. (Not that I'm fishing fo compliments, just... reassurance.) Do you people really like my fics?

She gunned them down | 12:07 AM

Now nobody can say I'm unproductive.

City of Angels ish dedicated to Maia, fiend that she is. Oiii~! Make me a fic. Come on, do it. I know you love me.



I'm trying (very hard) to write Evangelion fic. Only I don't get it-- Adam was ingested by Ikari Gendo and Lilith was... Rei? Gyaak.


The Official List of Fics to Ficcate So That Some People Can Sparkle: (TOLFFSTSPCS)

1.) Masquerade- monster that it is. To make Varon sparkle.

2.) Nocturne- Also for her.

3.) The Illusione Arc- nine more unedited oneshots of pure unadulterated hell. It's just not fair. However, am positively motivated because she liked 'Inflorescence'. ^-^

4.) Silenci- so she can sparkle and write me RenixIris multipart. Hwee. ^-^ (also, to bribe with for Syaoran Monogatari if not Kanaete)

5.) One- WAFF fest for her. Imouto gift-fic.

6.) Could've Been- to make her, her, her and her sparkle. thank you for the advice on the opening sequence, I boggled muchly, and then your email came!~ I wub.

7.) Fairy Tale- way overdue birthday gift fic for her. I swear, I write you too much fic.

8.) No Me Ames- song fic, as an answer to her fic challenge to me. ^-^

9.) Until You Do- because she needs to sparkle. And she's my imouto.

10.) Waiting For You- imouto gift-fic for her.

All right, I think that's pretty much it. Just a lot of imouto and oneesan gift-fic and because I want certain people to sparkle madly. I try. ^-^

She gunned them down | 12:05 AM

Friday, October 25, 2002

Yesh, Oneesama. I know it's canon for Eriol to call Tomoyo "Daidouji-san". I was ranting about the ignorance of some people about that particular fact. Ho well. Nevr could say life is perfect. ^-^

All right, I might rant on this one.

Some people have been--

a.) asking me for fic.

Case point: Not that I don't like ficcing. In fact, I love making gift-fic for people (because it motivates me) but... she's just not my type of person, if ya know what I mean. i think you and you are talking about the same person I am. Eiii.

I hope I'm not being a biatch or anything. I mean, I'd love to write gift-fic for people, but only, I suppose, to people who I think deserve them. In short, no, I am NOT writing anybody a fic until they are either at the second level of my consanguinity fic-wise (imouto; oneesama) or they impress me. Really, really impress me.

b.) Case point numero siete- entitulo: I have created a monster

Somebody's been asking for Masquerade chap10. Every single day. I don't mind being pestered by fic as long as it's Neesama or any one of the imouto-tachi but this was ridiculous: I barely knew her, and she was... there is no other word: pestering.

Argh. Logic lost in midst of rantage. Will post again.

And yes, Refe, you MAY ask me for ficcage. ^-^ You don't even have to beg.

She gunned them down | 1:40 AM

Thursday, October 24, 2002

You mean Shinichi grew to normal size?? Already?? But he's regressing?! That's IT!! I'm rearranging my sked on third term and I'm leaving school by 1240~!

And. I will fic for Choco, I will fic for Les, I will fic for Varon, Neesama and Meemee, I will fic for Chelle and Maia, I will fic for Harle, but I will be DAMNED if I fic for that girl.

She gunned them down | 11:21 PM

No, I haven't watched Conan lately, love. I have school in Manila and it takes two hours to get home, so, sic. Anyway, I HAVE tried ficcing Conan only I'm not as good as I want to be in mystery stuff. Wee--ll. Tell me, who's the new guy, what is his purpose, and why is he there?

Gosh, I miss anime afternoons.

Ah. I thank her for making me fic. Eee, I sparkle. I'm reading it. Will review it. ^-^

She gunned them down | 12:25 AM

Excerpt of "City of Angels", ExT undecided-if-multi-or-oneshot:

I have come so far so fast that I I haven't had the time to ask if this is where I want to be.

Once, it was said, you will come to love a being with all of your heart and even more of your soul. Once, you will be defined solely by this love, such that you are not yourself any longer. You are an embodiment of love and love alone. You exist from day to day for the purpose of loving. You are devoid of purpose, of meaning, except that of loving. Once in your life, you will smile though you are sad, cry though you are happy. All this will happen to you when you are faced with that one great love, that comes only once, in your entire life.

There were none of the cliches that were usually present in the event of her heartbreak.

It was not dark, there was no rain, the clouds offered her no gloom. Silence did not reign, she was not alone. She was not wearing black, her eyes did not fill with tears, her heart did not squeeze painfully in her chest. She could still breathe, could still speak. Her spirit did not die. It was not a Friday night.

Instead it was a sparkling Sunday morning at the park, the sky was bright, the clouds were white and puffy. She was wearing a sundress of bright blue, her eyes were filled with joy. Everywhere there was incoherent, lovely noise of children playing and people laughing. Her heart was beating just fine.

But she knew the truth and sometimes truth didn't show much on reality.


People, you'll think I'm angsting again but actually, "City.." is going to be pretty WAFF. But then, again, what is WAFF without a bit of angstation beforehand? Empty, that's what. ^-^

Actually, "City of Angels" is not just a fic. That excerpt up there should be put on the main log because it's how I actually feel. Sometimes, when I angst, I make myself be the fic and write down what I write in such that it can be relate-able. I guess I put too much of myself in fic that I actually live it: see case point seis for example. Is that a bad thing? I don't really know. Sometimes, to me, creating fic is not just conjuring them from nowhere. They have to have me in them. Literal me.

To ze mighty people who commented on LJ, thankies plenty. I feel much loved. ^-^

She gunned them down | 12:17 AM

Tuesday, October 22, 2002

What dost all of thee say to me writing "Roswell" fic?

Because I do adore Roswell. Ever since I saw it. ^-^ Lovely things, Max and Liz. Never mind the weird alien goop. ^-^

She gunned them down | 2:58 AM

Case point numero seis- entitulo: la fangrrl and writing issues

I think it's her that made me sit up and do this.

I am a fangirl. I'll say that up front. I exhibit all forms of fangirl behavior, and I write fic for the sheer purpose of being a fangirl to the point of extremity. It's not such a bad life.

I entered fangirl stage at the time when Mamoru was the hottest thing to hit Philippine shores. I haven't stopped since then. I may be what the Japanese call derisively 'otaku', as anime is my life, anime soundtracks my existence, manga my oxygen. This, people, is called obssession. (spell that for me?)

But I do NOT write fic because I'm too much of a fangirl

I write fic because, it's solid, it's stable, and I can excel in it. The thing is, throw me a cast with set bases and personalities and I can conjure you magic. Give me a blank slate and I will stare. In short, I am completely clueless if given to original fiction. I never liked making up my own characters, solidifying them, and then throwing them into fabricated situations. Granted, I can fabricate situations. Just give me characters that I can manipulate. (Like playing with dolls)

I also have a problem being original in original fiction. Is there a plot out there not yet written by someone else in the same respect? There are so many things you can write about! says my editor. Yes, I reply, and I've been beaten to it by at least ten more writers. At least, in fanfiction, I know what I can write, and I know I'll be the first one out with it.

I did say once that I wanted to be a member of the literary folio of the university I'm in. For a few months, they treated me as one of them. I submitted a few original stuff but was met with almost always the same reply: it's cliched. Unoriginal.

I thrive on criticism, but this was particularly ridiculous: what the heck have I to write about then? Not that I was offended or anything, but these folio people, they're GOOD. Really. So I believed them.

So I retreated back to my fanfics. Smith's Absolute Advantage Theory? Go where you excel at. I'm not a coward, and I can take negativity. The thing is, there was just... nothing there that could fascinate me. So I retreated back to the fangirl I am: because at least here, I know where I can go. I know and I can walk without fear.

The point: I'm a fangirl because I'm scared of real life. I've often said in the main log that fic was eating up my life. It wasn't that. It was that I'd rather drown in my fic than swim uncertain waters. It's that I'd rather live an anime life than try to make sense of my real one. It's that in anime, I have a purpose for being. And in reality, I'm scared to death. Without her, her and her, I wouldn't survive. Without all of you. [Mee love, Les darling, Choco darling, Eves-san, Belle-san, Chelle-san, Varon dahling]

Without my anime or my fic, I am nothing.

She gunned them down | 2:51 AM

Monday, October 21, 2002

Adventures of the Mini-Ficcers!
starring Harle, Ekai annnnnnnnndddd Maia! In the handy chibi size!

Episode 2: When Chibi-Ekai goes trolling off to FF.n

Chibi-Ekai: I'll just troll off to FF.n today!~ I haven't dug through the dregs in months...

[Chibi-Ekai goes off to read fic and is promptly stupefied]


[Chibi-Ekai scampers away from the PC as big bad fic rush out to haunt her]

Chibi-Ekai (running): HOOOOOEEEEE!!!

In another part of the vicinity...

Chibi-Maia hears a voice! A familiar voice screaming a familiar expression that could only be...

Chibi-Maia: It's Ekai!

[Chibi-Maia finds Chibi-Ekai trying to squeeze self into a corner]

Chibi-Maia: What's wrong?

[The big, bad fic jumps Chibi-Maia!!]

Chibi-Maia: Eeeeeeeeek!

[Chibi-Maia then transforms into....]

Chibi-Maia: Moon Prism Power! Make-up!

Chibi-Maia: Ultraelectroradiated FLAME attaaaaaaaack!~

[Big, bad fic burns in the flame!]

Bad fic: Aaaaargh! We're not worthy!

Chibi-Maia: *Maia-moon victory stance*

Chibi-Ekai: My head hurts....

Chibi-Maia: There, there. *pat pat*

Chibi-Ekai: Me want mozzarella stick.

[Chibi-Harle appears!]

Chibi-Harle: *hands Chibi-Ekai a mozzarella stick while nibbling on a waffle*

Chibi-Harle: Bad fic attack?

Chibi-Maia: Horrible.

Chibi-Ekai: *nibbling* Remind me to bring the Firey card whenever I troll back into FF.n.

[Chibi-Maia and Chibi-Harle nod as one]

-end episode 2-

She gunned them down | 3:36 AM

Sunday, October 20, 2002

I did SAY I was only going to flame deserving people, ne, Mee love? You certainly don't. *huggles imouto*

Maia: go to any anime fic genre and pick a fic, any fic. Owww. My head, my heeeaaad...

She gunned them down | 9:10 PM

The mere proliferation of bad-fic on net hurts my already hurting head. I breezed through 20 pages of fic on the CCS genre on FF.n and now I have a headache. Maiaaa.~

I know I shouldn't be one to talk, after all I am only human and a fic writer like the rest. But STILL.

Case point numero cinco- entitulo: el ficcation de la baka-tachi

The ten fic peeves of Ekai Ungson, circa 2002:

1.) Bad titles. - Come on, people. Some of them are grammatically incorrect, some of them are all in caps (DON'T SHOUT!), some of them are obvously ripoffs...

2.) Summaries that do NOT summarize - Like "You wanna know what it's about? Then read!!!!^-^". *sigh*

3.) Unlikely pairings - Syaoran and Tomoyo?! Yue and TOMOYO?! (that'd be pretty boring actually) Kaho and Fujitaka (do these people even know each other?). My list goes on and it's not going to be pretty.

4.) Clan wars - as discussed by her some time ago.

5.) Chinese names - as also discussed by her . "Ying Fa!" "Xiao Lang!" and the fact that Tomoyo is a plum blossom. *sigh*

6.) Proliferation of song fics - than have more song than fic. It's abnormal.

7.) Proliferation of bad crossovers of CCS and Harry Potter - because I know what good crossover is, dammit!

8.) Proliferation of movie ripoffs - like "A Walk to Remember" or "Titanic" or "On the Line". My head reaaaaalllly hurts.

9.) Proliferation of AXN kawaii Japanese - as discussed by her on the WLFA.

10.) Proliferation of too much SxS destiny fic - that almost always have the same plots and ending, even narration. Y'know, she dreams about her destiny, he dreams about his, they get together someplace and voila, kissing scene, owari. Daaang.

11.) Name issues - Eriol calls Tomoyo by her last name!! >.< (and Ekai needs aspirin, an ice pack, and good fic by now)

12.) Some strange phenomena: proliferation of Lavigne's "Sk8er Boi" fics. (Daikirai!)

List subject to extension.

*Chibi-Ekai gets ice pack.*

She gunned them down | 9:06 PM

I may just ask...

We ARE a bit entitled to flame, right?

Because I haven't made a flame for the life of me and I feel like I want to flame a whole bunch of people. So I will. I'll do it only to people who deserve to be flamed! Go, me? ^-^

Ei, Maia. Jump on, we're going a flame-ing today!~

She gunned them down | 8:17 PM

Kyaa!~ Go to main log! Go, go, go!!~

She gunned them down | 7:48 PM

Thursday, October 17, 2002

Because there is madness...

Adventures of the Mini-Ficcators!
starring Harle, Ekai aaaannnnndddd... Maia! In the handy chibi size!

Episode 1: When Chibi-Ekai and Chibi-Harle let loose at the Library

Chibi-Ekai: *looks around the shelves* Hooee... the book's not here...
Chibi-Harle: But it says in the call number that it's 'on shelf', so it's got to be there someplace...
Chibi-Ekai: Mouu. I want that book. Ish the anime book we need for our research paper...
Chibi-Harle: Maybe it's in the reserve section?

[Chibi-Ekai and Chibi-Harle skip to the reserve section]

Librarian-guy: Oh, the anime book? Have you checked the sorting shelf?
Chibi-Ekai: Sorting shelf!~

[Chibi-Ekai and Chibi-Harle skip to the sorting shelf]

Chibi-Harle: N, N, the letter N... 3660...
Chibi-Ekai: Yatta! Here it is!~ *waves book in the air*

[Chibi-Ekai and Chibi-Harle check the book out of the library and skip their way to the benches outside]

Chibi-Ekai and Chibi-Harle: La la la la... we've gone to research for anime in the wonderful wonderful library! And we've found a wonderful wonderful book that talk about--
Chibi-Ekai: Hey, Evangelion! *gasp* Shinjishinjishinji!!!~
Chibi-Harle: Hey, Rurouni Kenshin!~ *swoons*'
Chibi-Ekai: *flips through pages* sugoi, it has anime history! And pictures and *flipflipflip*
Chibi-Harle: Ekai-chan?
Chibi-Ekai: *burinku burinku*
Chibi-Harle: Eh?? *grabs book*
Chibi-Harle: *flipflipflip*
Chibi-Harle: *burinkuu burinkuu*
Chibi-Ekai: Hoooeee..
Chibi-Harle: Hentai?
Chibi-Ekai: Hooooeeee!~

Chibi-Harle: (as Yamazaki) It says here that Hentai is essentially about demons and the like because Japanese men apparently cannot be virile and sexually potent if they are not in demonic form, thus explaining why they need...
Chibi-Ekai: ... uhh.. extensions! in their... uh... bodies!
Chibi-Harle: and... tentacles! in their... hands!
Chibi-Ekai: Hoooooeeeeee!~

[Chibi-Ekai and Chibi-Harle shudder as one]

-end episode 1-

She gunned them down | 3:01 AM

Wednesday, October 16, 2002

More ficcation coming through...

Do you know how much I hate you at the moment? I slept at two last night rereading (five times!) those Gundam fics. Addictive!~ Gaaah. Also the RK lemon. I quite think the woman rules, no?


New ficcation: "Ground Level". It's a 1xR, because Maia squicksquicksquicks at yaoi in general, and the damn thing is dedicated to her, so of course I'd have to adhere to her standards. It's an AU. And it's not so angsty.... but it's... there is no other word for it... tough. Will post on developments soon. Harle love has seen the prologue and has heard the projections. She likes it. ^-^


And since I seem to be ranting a lot about fic lately...

Case point numero quatro- enitulo: el titulo de 'oneesama'

At this moment in time I now have a round number of... nine? imoutos. And I love them all to bits. My imoutos happen to be extremely talented ficcators and I am somewhere near very proud and honored to have them for little sisters. ^-^

Anyway. On the subject of choosing imoutos. I happen to be *extremely* picky about the people I want as imoutos. I even have specific criteria! No, they do not have to be perfect, as no one is perfect and to look for perfect people would be a perfidy and a lie, and no, they do not have to go through any exams or tests to be my imouto.

All they do have to have is a sparkle. I can't define it exactly (essentially contested concept) but I can pretty much say that I know that my sisters have the sparkle. I'm talking about 'Mee love and how she just writes with this much emotion. I'm talking about Les darling and how she really strives to make her fic better (and yes, I LOVE "Scarlet".). I'm talking about these people and how if only with a bit of patience and pruning can be far better than anyone with their plots (so pretty!~). People I love with all my heart for not just being ficcers, but friends.

And yes, now they ALL have rights to ask me for updates, request for fics, ask for beta, get taunted by teasers and glomp me as madly as possible. I love glomps. *glomps the sisterhood, Oneesama-tachi, and Varon*

Wait. They get to have right to threaten me for fic?!

I'm doomed.

Oh, and Mee love, do you mind terribly if I call you imouto as well? It just seems impolite to not ask. ^-^

She gunned them down | 9:29 PM

New link of the day: Imouto no. 3, Choco Drop. ^------^

She gunned them down | 1:47 AM

Tuesday, October 15, 2002

Because it was impossible to resist:

Silenci I: Tango Alone. Which means Oneesama, sparkle. I dare you not to. ^-^

annnnnnd The Product of Much Evil and talking to Maia 'til midnight

Okay, people. Sparkle na.

She gunned them down | 8:49 PM

Monday, October 14, 2002

Ekai Ungson came into the world on April 20th of the year 1985.


Anyway, on to the madness!

Oneesama, I have succesfully found the Leni-Iris episode in the 2nd OAV and I sparkled so much I think I lit up the whole music room like it was Christmas morning. Hanyaaan!~

Reni-on-screen: Iris is sunshine. It's my job to make her shine even more beautifully. (sic?)
Me: Hanyaaaan!~

So I sparkled so MUCH that I began to re-edit 'Silenci' with renewed vigor. The result? Because it's impossible to resist and it's impossible to put it all down in a oneshot: "Silenci I: Tango Alone".

Basically? I'm dividing Silenci into three parts that will be ready as soon as I can wangle school out of the way and such.

Me: *wangles with school* get out of my way, you abomination school you!

So, Oneesama, I typed the whole thing up last night and it's getting to you by tomorrow. Sparkle. Sparkle, I say!


I've been getting to thinking a lot about ficcation lately. So I'm going to present a few case points I think I should ponder along.

Case point numero uno- entitulo: R&R

I like reviews. In fact, I practically thrive on reviews because, hey, I like feedback, whether good or bad or whatever. (It's called self-gratification, baka!)

Not to be mean, but don't you just think that a LOT of authors on are well... vying for the Shameless Self-Publication Award? (thanks to Maia love for that lovely phrase)

This is not going to be a rant. I say this is NOT going to be a rant.

Personally, I save my signed reviews for people who actually deserve them. I'm talking about extremely brilliant fics, a few not so brilliant but good plot fics, and fics that need much tweaking but are fine nonetheless fics.

Anyway, I've been getting a few reviews from a few people who want me to review their fics. So I go, because I'm a good little Ekai. The thing is....

Well, the fics they offer me are something I don't even want to go into.

I mean, the point to case point numero uno is this. Leave me a review, that's fine. Don't leave me a review is also fine because I don't ask for anything that people can't give me (except when I'm asking Oneesama for the next part of Kanaete which is an entirely different ballpark altogether). The thing is, I wish they won't.. uh... post a commercial or an advertisement of their fic on my review. It's just... terribly unprofessional.

Case point numero dos- entitulo: Nandesuka...?

I have told these wonderful marvelous people that I love and worship about this teensy weensy problem I have regarding intellectual property rights and if I do have them per se. I don't want to be pointing at any fingers but can I just ask the whole lot of you, Can you guard your fic plots against anyone?

Someone has stolen the base plot of "Could've Been". I'm not mentioning names but someone has taken the idea, MY idea (Clow=Eriol; Tomoyo=Madoushi) and made it into a new fic. As far as I know I'm the only one who ever thought up such a scheme and I think I'd like to keep it that way. The thing is... do I have a RIGHT to? I'm really confused here. I don't really know if I've got a right to bar people from using my ideas. It's just that idea anyway, and it's not like she copy-pasted the whole thing (thank God it has not happened to me as yet) but... still.

Case point numero tres- entitulo: Gawddamit! Ekai's writing angst fic again!

Have you guys noticed that I haven't been writing WAFF exactly, lately?

I'm thinking I'm getting depressed of myself. I suppose the solution can be found in "Silenci" but the thing is when I write pure unadulterated WAFF something triggers in me to hit the backspae button and start deleting the whole passage and replacing it with much drama.

God, whap me. With WAFF, please.

She gunned them down | 8:26 PM

Sunday, October 13, 2002

Varon dahlin, 'Inflorescence' is something you must read to comprehend. So go read it. Masquerade 9 is ready to go. Maybe tomorrow. You guys spoil all my fun.

Thanks for the 'Complainte' reviews, darlins. Eee.

She gunned them down | 9:41 PM

Got mysef a yahoo group. Here. Join?

She gunned them down | 9:16 PM


She gunned them down | 9:01 PM

Kyaa. Blame Maia darling for "Junshin" appearing on the CCS list. I got distracted by her powerful Fujima fanart. Girl, you oughta be downright outlawed. Nobody should be allowed to draw that well! Anyway, I just fixed it. *sigh*.

Ne, Oneesama, I found a copy of Sakura Taisen 2nd OVA. [It's actually out in bootleg! (Sorry I bootleg. No cash for original stuff, and besides that I have NO idea where to get the fansubs. Moouuuu.)] Yesh, thank you, I'm falling. Head over heels, might I add. Reni Milchstrasse is FINE. Are you SURE she's a she? Because you said you can't join Hanagumi if you're a guy. But THEN Oogami is a guy, right?

Oogami: No, I'm a genetically enhanced android.
Me: Oh, bah.

Anyway, which episode of the OVA contains the one about Reni? I want Reni-centric things. I WUUUUV Reni. God! Reniiii!~ Marry me!~

Reni: ¬.¬

Ish so cute because Iris really DOES cling to Reni. Clings a lot. I watched it with my brothers, my sister, and two of my counsins.

Ann: That boy with the silver hair is cute!
Me: He's a she, darling.
Ann: *horrified* He can't be a she! He doesn't have... *blinku blinku*
Me: *nod nod* I know.


Anyway, we were alternately screaming over Oogami, Reni, and Kanna. God, Kanna in the 3rd episode as the detective guy is bishounen raised to the tenth power. EEEE!~

I wanna get the 5th and 6th episodes. The trailer said something about Sakura-san going home? And getting married? (To Oogami, please! Darn, I'm SUCH a fangirl. ^-^)

All right. I'll go sane now.

Last Saturday I went to darling Harle's last Saturday. Damn, that was a good day. Gooood. Pizza and Pepsi and Playstation games! Pictures and fanart, fanfiction galore! Damn, you really shouldn't put fangirls in one room together. To borrow from the WLFA: "What happens when fangirls unite? Nothing good, that's for sure." Kyaaaahahahaha. Harle, Maia, we should do this more often. ^-^

Today's new link is Les darling. ^-^

She gunned them down | 8:52 PM

Friday, October 11, 2002

Posted fics on FF.n. Entitled "Junshin" and "Complainte de la Butte". Unfortunately, FF.n died just now so I can't put up the links as yet. Mou.

She gunned them down | 9:26 PM

Belle-san, arigato. ^-^ I'm very glad you liked "Inlforescence".

And Oneesama, too. Glad you liked "Mellow..". ^-^

I feel LOVED!~

She gunned them down | 3:39 AM

I tried to put up my newest ficlet yesterday. (Tentatively) entitled "Complainte de la Butte". But then the net was down and now, kyaa.

She gunned them down | 2:50 AM

Wednesday, October 09, 2002

Kyaa, you. I don't hate "Akogare" OR "Kanaete". I LOVE them. To pieces like. In fact, when I read your Eriol, I shudder.

Eriol: I'm VERY smooth, aren't I?
Me: Like fun, you are. >.>

It's just that Kaho is... Kaho. I know I know maybe Eriol really is THAT old in terms of mind and soul and maybe he really IS best suited for Kaho who might even be YOUNGER than him but still. Aside from the fact that it's just something I'm not used to (and the imagery was so REAL, dammit, I could actually SEE a kid and a grown woman kissing) I'm just a rabid Tomoyo fangrrl. And my Tomoyo wants her Eriol. Now.

Tomoyo: *bares fangs*

Then again all I have to look at is Kobayashi Hatoko and I just know that EriolxTomoyo is not as fanon as we think. ^-^ That kid is SO cute.

And, yes, Oneechan you can have "Starcast". I'll mail you whatever I have later. ^-^ My Oneesama writing 'Starcast'! I sparkle!!

She gunned them down | 9:53 PM

Monday, October 07, 2002

I was reading Oneesama's "Akogare" and then "Kanaete" and I had to write about them; because I just realized something.

I read fic fast. That's because I'm paying for service and if I linger I end up using up hundreds from my allowance. As much as I'm addicted, I can't afford it, and I AM just a 17 year old kid, so I save 'em all on disk and read them at home where I have infinite time.

Okay, I'll repeat that. I've been rereading Oneesama's "Kanaete" (which I think is beautiful no matter how much she says to the contrary) and I realize that everytime I go read it, every single time, I skip her 3rd chapter, "Aoi Kioku".

It's not that I don't like Oneesama's writing (yes, that's sacrilege, I DO know), it's just that there's this scene at the end, and no I don't need to tell you all what you already know, and that scene, it just makes me squick. >.<

Sorry, I know. The mere thought is just so... off to me. >.<

She gunned them down | 11:46 PM

Sunday, October 06, 2002

Eriol: Fic "Nocturne"
Kai: Bull, Hiiragizawa. I am NOT writing your self-gratification. Go to a better writer.
Eriol: C'mon, it'll test your strategies.
Kai: No, Hiiragizawa.
Eriol: You're always writing Syaoran-Sakura. It's unfair.
Kai: I'm trying to finish "Dream Chaser"!
Eriol: "Dream Chaser" doesn't hace a het scene.
Kai: Bull.

I really, REALLY cannot write het. Help in that category would be muchly appreciated. Also, people, put me on crack. Seems to be good. >.<

She gunned them down | 9:01 PM


I'm taking "Could've Been" out of hiatus. Why? Too many people want it. Why? I can't stand it hanging over my head. I really don't want to give it up.

Nee, Chelle-sama. I'm sending you email. Now. Oneesama too. Sophie? Email? Ad? And Eves-san. >.> I need replies ASAP. Hai?

I have something to say.

Also, I'm trying to get my Eriol outta the fandom!Eriol category. Is my Eriol fandom!Eriol? Someone say something. My Tomoyo's fandom!Tomoyo too. I need to reread the manga.


She gunned them down | 8:31 PM


She gunned them down | 12:42 AM

Posted. Updated Masquerade and Until You Do, then posted two new oneshots. Here and here. Read me, read me! ^-^

Basically I'm unable to write new fic. The most recent thing I've written from scratch is Mellow Candle. Inflorescence was written a year ago, Masquerade and UYD have been finished since last year also.

I have about fifteen unfinished fics in storage. I'm putting a few of them in adoption.

1.) Starcast- I know Oneesama knows about this. If you people have seen "Somewhere in Time" with Christopher Reeve, it's something to that effect. Eriol finds a picture of a young jazz singer in the library he works in. (Isn't it SUCH an Eriol thing if he works in a library?) The photo dates 1960s. He becomes just a TAD obsessed and he goes on to try and go back in time to get to the girl. Yes, it's up for adoption. I can't cut it. Email me if you want the full summary or whatever chapters I have down. [Adopt me!]

2.) Nocturne- Oneesama knows about this, too. I consulted her on it. It's a weird Eriol+Tomoyo. Eriol is a rich bachelor. He's so rich he can afford to be a total bum and he does nothing with his life except drink, party, and have sex. Tomoyo is a girl who frequents the parties Eriol throws because she's a friend-of-the-friend-of-the-friend. She's a deep brooding little thing and she drives a mean Harley. The catch: Tomoyo doesn't like men. Eriol wants her. It's also up for adoption but I think I can work on it some more. [Adopt me!]

3.) Mask- It's Sorcerer Hunters, if you can believe that, and it's a Marron-Tira. I know it's strange, but hey. [Adopt me!]

4.) For The Love of Me- SxS fluff and stuff that I'm incapable of, now. I think I'll call it 'The Beautiful Alone Phenomena'. [Adopt me!]

5.) Belief III: Freedom- I just don't know enough about Yamazaki or Chiharu. This thing reads rushed and no amount of tweaking does anything to it. Argh! [Adopt me!]

I'm posting the others next week. I MIGHT keep Starcast & Nocturne but they're very welcome to anybody who wants 'em. >.<

She gunned them down | 12:16 AM

Thursday, October 03, 2002's down!~ Mouuuu. Ahhh! Meemee, mail is there. Itsh gotta be. I sent it yesterday and if it ain't then that's really wrong somehow. >.< I'll get yahoo for this.

Wrote fic last night but unable to upload 'cause FF.n's bugging. Anyway, it's called "Mellow Candle" and yes, the title is from Weiss Kreuz just like "Beautiful Alone" because it IS a pseudo-sequel to "Beautiful..". It's also dedicated to Neesama. Because I want her to sparkle a little before I dish out 'Silenci' (now known as the Reni-Iris Fic from Hell ^-^).

SO! It IS Daiki Asuka Jr! I kinda thought it wasn't 'cause I heard someione tell me 'Daiki' meant 'officer' or police? Gawd. I should be learning Nihongo by meself, really. Mali-mali 'ata itinuturo sa'kin.

EEEH? Somebody tell me something, has anybody been posting Hunter X fanfic? Anywhere? I want, need an archive. For 'Iris'.

Make me fic. Anyone. ^-^

She gunned them down | 9:53 PM

this girl

Name: Ekai Ungson-
Age: 20-
From: the Philippines-
Job: fanfiction writer-


I fic log!~ Looking through my FF.n profile, I...
Have added Calendar-san to link list. Hweeeeeeeee....
I changed the template because it needed changing....
Fic me Shaman King and I will worship thee. I'd do...
yes, i have updated. new draco/gin fic entitled "t...
People who can point me to v. good Hiro/Kisa fan f...
People who can point me to v. good Hiro/Kisa fan f...
erk! i can't view my blog.
new template up and running. i don't suppose anyon...
is the new template working?


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